How To Be A Dad
by BTRcreativewriter
Summary: James is in the prime of his life, he's a young bachelor not looking forward to settling down. But when a baby out of nowhere appears at his front door, he has no choice but to learn how to be a dad.
1. Chapter 1

James' POV

I took a deep breath before I opened my eyes. I smelled something that caught my attention. I quickly opened my eyes and see a piece of pizza on the floor below me. I reached and grabbed the tasty treat. It was cold and possibly a couple days old but pizza is pizza and its good no matter what. I made my way into the bathroom, and ate my pizza as I went. One look in the mirror told me I had one hell of a night last night. I smirked to myself. And it all came back to me or up until I don't remember anymore. I had dinner with my date and then we took it back to her place, and somehow I ended up at my apartment. But my place was a mess so that tells me I had an awesome time. I ran a comb through my hair and took the last bite of the pizza. Then there was a knock on the door.

"Kendall, wassup buddy?" I said and let him in my apartment.

"Dude this place is a mess. What happened?"

I walked over to him, "The bachelor life bro. I gurantee you I got laid last night." I smiled to myself. Kendall looked at me then looked away, "Okay sounds like you had fun, but who's that guy?"

"Who?"

Kendall pointed towards some dude passed out behind the couch. His pants were missing and that worried me.

"I did not see him there." I said. Kendall made his way to the guy and tried to wake him up. "Hello? Anybody there?" He lightly slapped the guys face, and we heard a groan. Okay, he was alive, good. His eyes opened slowly and he lifted his head up. Kendall lifted him up and led him out the door. I saw a pair of pants on the counter, and threw them out into the hallway.

Kendall walked back in, "Wow, that was weird. That dude just told me that he loves me."

"He's probably still hungover."

Kendall nods, "Oh, and by the way, the real reason I'm here is to invite you to dinner with me and Jo. We decided to have a nice get together with our friends."

"What so...Me, Carlos, Logan, and Jackie?"

"And don't forget Olivia."

I mentally slapped myself, "Right how could I forget Carlos' girl?"

"So are you in?" Kendall asked.

"Sure."

"Good I'll tell Jo." He turned around to leave, but then turned around again to face me. "By the way you should clean up here, this place is a mess."

"I'm on it mom."

"Bye you retard." Kendall joked.

"Get out of here you bastard." I joked back.

After three hours I finally got my apartment sparkly clean. I found another person passed out in the hallway closet. I had to use a brrom to get him out. And I decided to take a shower, after all I am going to dinner with my buds this evening. Can't go smelling like sweat.

After my shower I decided to wear some dark denim jeans, my nike air force 1's, a white button up, a black tie, and my black blazer. I combed my hair back, sprayed some cuda on,and I was ready. I got into my audi drove fifteen miles north. I pulled up into a suburban area and stopped in front of a house. I got out and made my way to the front porch, and knocked on the door. She answered shortly after, "Het." She said brightly.

"Hey yourself." I said.

"What are you doing here?"

"I just wanted to make sure we were still on for tuesday night?"

"You best your sexy ass we are." She bit her lip.

"My place next time, okay gorgeous?" I winked. She then grabbed me by my shirt and kissed me.

"I'll see you then Captain." She purred.

"Bye sweetheart." I said and made my way back to my car. I took out my schedule and marked Tuesday night as busy...Man I love being single!

Now I had to go talk to the other woman I have booked for Thursday night...I thought to myself, I don't need to settle down, not when I live like this. I'm in my prime, and I'm gonna do me, all day, everyday. I don't know what goes through Kendall's mind when he tells me I should settle down.

Kendall's POV

"Jo his house was a mess. There was even a guy passed out behind the couch."

"That doesn't sound surprising." Jo said putting on an earring.

"I just don't understand why he can't just find a nice girl to settle down with?" Its not that hard."

"Kendall you should just let it go, James will be James, and do things whatever it is James' do." She stood up to face me, and I was taken aback by her beauty.

"You look...gorgeous." I said

"Thank you." She kissed my cheek.

"Don't worry about James, he's a big boy." She said. I followed her out of the room and we went down the stairs and into the livingroom. The kids were watching tv. Well Ben and Emma were, Damian was sleeping.

"Okay kiddos, mommy and I are about to leave."

The doorbell rang and Jo answered. "Hi Katie."

"Hey Jo...Kendall."

"Hey baby sister." I said.

"So where are yo two love birds going tonight?" Katie asked.

"We are going to dinner with the other guys and girls."

"where?"

"Romeo's"

"Oooo...fancy.." Katie said.

"Aunt Katie!" Ben and Emma rushed to Katie and gave her a hug.

"Hey guys."

"Okay dinner is on the stove, make sure you brush their teeth, take thema bath, and put them to bed by eight or nine if they can't sleep until a little later. And Damian just had his last bottle, but if he starts crying after a couple of hours he may want another bottle. But he's already in his pj's and putting him to bed should be easy. Any questions?" I said.

"just one. How long will you guys be out?"

"Possibly all night, I don't know yet."

I kissed my kids goodbye and I took Jo's hand and walked past Katie.

"Bye Katie, bye Ben, bye Emma."

Jackie's POV

Kendall said we'd meet up in the parking lot but so far I was the only one there. Well I was the only one until James came.

"Hey Jackie!" He smiled.

"James!" He hugged me.

"Well don't you look ravishing." He said, I blushed.

"Thanks, you look very handsome yourself."

"I try."

He pointed towards a bench. "Shall we sit and wait for the others?"

"We shall."

We waited for what seemed like forever.

"It's seven o' clock where is everybody?" I asked.

"Maybe we should go inside, its getting kinda cold out here. C'mon." James said.

He took my hand and helped me up, then he put his hand on the small of my back, like a gentleman. And we went towards the entrance.

"There yo guys are!" Kendall said.

"Yes, here we are." I said.

"We've been waiting for you tow." Logan said.

"Well we were waiting outside, ya know, in the cold where we all said we were going to meet up at." James said.

"Well like you said, it got cold." Logan said.

"Well we're all here now, lets go eat." said Kendall. We all followed him to a long table made for eight but only seven people filled it up.

James happened to pull a seat out for me, so I thanked him and sat down. He sat down next to me. Logan gave me a look. It was one of those, ooo-he-likes-you, kind of looks. I gave Logan an annoyed look and he shrugged.

James POV

In the middle of our get together I got a phone call. I looked at my screen and saw that it was my Thursday night lady calling me. I looked at everybody, "Uh, excuse me guys, I have a very imporatnt phone call to attend to." I got up and walked to a corner in the restaurant.

"Hello..." I said smoothly.

"C'mon Tiger, me, you, my place, right now." She said sexily.

"As much as I'd LOVE to, I'm kinda busy right now." I said apologeticaly.

"I'm laying in bed with _nothing on..."_ An image of her butt naked popped into my mind. But then I reminded myself that I was in a restaurant and the last thing I needed right now was a boner in public.

"Sorry babe, but thursday we are so on." I said and hung up before she could say anything else that'll make James Jr. pop up. I walked back to my friends and sat down.

"Who was that?" asked Carlos.

"Just some business I had to take care of, don't worry about it." I said.

"For your job type of business?" He asked.

"Yes Carlos, it was a job related issue."

"Is everything okay?" Jo asked.

"Everything is fine, they needed me to come in on short notice right now, but I said I was with my best friends so I couldn't go."

"That's so sweet." Olivia commented.

"Isn't it?"

I saw Kendall staring right at me. "So when are you going back to 'work'?" He asked.

"Tomorrow." I said staring directly back at him, "Don't we all go to work tomorrow? It is Monday."

Kendall nodded. He's the only one who pretty much knows about my weekly hook-ups. Everyone else knows I hoop up with random girls ocassionally.

After a couple of seconds they let the discussion drop.

"So Jo, Kendall how are the kids?" Olivia asked.

"Great! They're all so wonderful." Kendall siad.

"Ben is going to start kindergarden next year." Jo added and Kendall nodded in agreement.

"You two are so lucky to be parents." Said Olivia.

I looked at my watch, eight thirty. Maybe I could still hit up the bar afterwards. I could use a couple of drinks, all this talk of kids is getting to me.

"Hey guys, is there a bar around here?" I asked.

"Yeah, just around the corner." Kendall said.

I push my my chair back and get out of my seat. "I'll be back." I said.

"You're not gonna drink are you?" Carlos asked.

"Carlos how long have you known me?"

"Since forever."

"I think you can answer that question by yourself."

Logan's POV

We watch james leave. Weird.

"He's gonna get drunk." Kendall said.

"And he drove his car here." Jackie added. James is a pretty good drunk driver, but there has been a couple incidents where he did get into a crash.

"I think someone should go with him, and make sure he doesn't drown himself in alcohol." Kendall said.

I got up, "i'll go."

I followed James out of the restaurant and around the corner. "James! Hold up!" I said, he stopped and waited for me to catch up.

"You don't drink Logan." He said.

"Maybe one won't hurt." We went in and found two bar stools. A bar tender came up to us, "One corona and a shot of vodka." James said, the bartender nodded and then looked at me.

"Uh, um...I'll have a budlite."

The bartender left to get our drinks.

"You're just here to make sure I don't get too drunk, am I right?" James said.

"What no..." I tried to lie but he gave me a I-know-you're-lying look. "Yeah I am."

"Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. You can go back to the rest of them."

I tapped the counter top, "That's what I've been wondering about." I said.

"Huh?" James asked confused.

"You left once the topic of Kendall's kids came up. You looked annoyed."

"Sorry Dr. Phil, I don't talk about my problems to anyone." James said, and the bartender came back with our orders. I watched James chug down his shot of vodka first and then he took a sip of his corona.

"No one? you have to talk to somebody." I said.

"I appreciate what you're trying to do Logan, but I'd rather be alone right now and drink this magnificent drink with alcohol in it."

I sighed, of course James wouldn't let anyone in.

"Well I tried, maybe next time." I put money on the counter for my beer.

"Make sure the bartender gets the money." I said.

"You didn't even open it." James said, I shrugged, "It doesn't matter." And then I left.

JAMES POV

After Logan left, I drank the rest of my corona and his untouched budlite. I then asked the bartender for three shots of Jack Daniels, and two of tequila, and one Grey Goose. I had them lined up and ready to drink when Jackie came in. Of course they would think that if a guy couldn't talk sense into me then maybe a girl could.

"Sit Jackie, and watch me make the liquid in the shot glasses disappear." I grinned.

"Please don't." She protested.

I held up three fingers and counted down, "Three, two, one."

First the Jack Daniels, then the Tequila, and lastly the Grey Goose. I felt my throat burn a little, not the best alcoholic combination I've made so far.

"Why?" Jackie questioned.

I leaned close to her, "because I can."

"Bartender dude! Give me another beer!" I yelled.

"No! No more beer!" Jackie yelled.

"Don't tell me how to live my life Jackie, I'll order another beer if I want to."

She looked straight into my eyes, "What's wrong?"

I looked away, the alcohol was getting to me and drunken words were sober thoughts.

"Will you promise not to tell anyone?" I slurred out.

"Yes I promise."

I held up my pinky, "Pinky swear?"

"I pinky swear James."

I leaned on the counter, "I don't like it when you guys try to tell me how to live my life. It's always: James you should settle down, James don't drink too much, James don't drag race, James don't do this, don't do that. I'm fucking tired of it! You guys won't let me be me. If I wanna drink, I'll drink, If I wanna do something stupid, let me do something stupid. I can take care of myself."

Jackie patted my shoulder, "There, there."

I felt tears coming in my eyes, "I just wanna go home Jackie."

"We'll take you home." She said.

"I just need one more beer."

**You guys likin' the story? Please review but don't review things like : 'More!' or 'Love it!' Because I actually want to know what you guys seriously think about it. Short one or two worded reviews don't really tell me much. **

**Thanks for reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

I woke up hungover, not surprising and I saw a cup of water with a pill on my night stand. There was a folded note next to the water. I reached for it and opened it. I recognized the handwriting as Jackie's. Hers was always girly and cursive.

'In case you don't remember anything, you went to the bar and got yourself drunk. You told me about how you don't want people telling you how to live your life. Logan and I brought you home. I got to drive your audi by the way! :D It was awesome! We put you to bed and I wrote you this note. Please drink the pills!

~ Jackie'

How sweet of Jackie. I chugged down the pills, and got out of bed. Today was monday and I had things to do. First, I had to thank Jackie and Logan for taking my drunk ass home.

I called Logan, and figured I could just pass by Jackie's work on my way to walmart.

I changed into some casual clothes and headed out.

Jackie works in an office building and its always hard to get ahold of her during business hours.

I went up to the receptionist and asked for Jackie Rose. The receptionist looked up me with lust filled eyes. She was a busty blonde, and I couldn't help but stare at her breasts. She bit her pen, and called Jackie to see if she was available. While doing this she leaned forward and I got a better look at her cleavage.

"Ms. Rose I have a visitor here waiting in the lobby. A Mr. Maslow."

Maybe this receptionist could be added to my list of hook-ups. I made a mental note to talk to her on my way out.

She hung up the phone. "You can go on up, fourth floor, second door on your right."

"Thank you...I didn't get your name?"

She took out a business card and wrote stuff down on it.

"The name's Kaylie." she said and handed me the card.

"Well thank you Kaylie." I winked at her and made my way to the elevator. I looked at the card she gave me and found a name, a phone number, and an address.

Wow, I'm that good.

I reached the fourth floor and and found Jackie's office. I knocked. And I heard a faint 'come in.' I opened the door slowly. "Hey Jackie."

"Glad to see you're feeling better." She said and smiled.

"Well thanks to you. Those pills you gave me did the trick." I took a seat in front of her desk.

"So what brings you here Maslow? You know I don't have a lot of free time to talk."

"Well I won't be here long. I just wanted to thank you for bringing my drunk ass home yesterday. I already thanked Logan, and I know it must be hard to have to look after a drunk friend like me all the time."

"You're welcome."

I saw a rubiks cube on her desk and picked it up. "And to show how much I thank you, I was wondering if you wanted to accompany me to lunch, and walmart."

Jackie looked from her computer screen to me. "Why walmart?"

"Because I can never decide between whole wheat or whole grain bread."

I set the rubiks cube down on her desk. It was solved.

"I'd have to check with my boss. My lunch hour isn't until another forty five minutes. "

I stood up, "Maybe I can help with that issue."

-5 minutes later-

"How did you get him to give me the rest of the day off?" Jackie questioned.

"Jackie don't question it, just enjoy it. Now, is Gino's okay with you?" I asked and drove downtown.

We found a nice booth near a window in the back of the pizza parlor. I had ordered a whole pizza, half pineapple and ham, and half pepperoni.

"Hey, you won't tell anybody what I told you last night, right?" I asked her.

"James, I pinky swore. You know I won't."

"Good."

I took a slice of the ham and pineapple.

"You know I was thinking..." I said as I took a bite of my pizza. "We should go to Vegas."

Jackie just stared at me, like if I had just sprouted another head.

"All of us. Think about it. The casino's, the hotels, the casino's...Especially the casino's, I'm not much of a gambler but I'm willing to give black jack a try." I raised an eyebrow.

"Sounds like fun.." she said and I smiled, "But..." she continued, "We all have things to do James. We're not like you and do whatever we want whenever we want. Kendall has his kids, Logan's working on his master's degree, Carlos is trying to open his own dance academy, and I've got my job."

My heart sunk, of course. Everybody has their responsibilities to attend to. They don't know the bright side of adulthood.

"So Vegas isn't gonna happen huh?"

"Not any time soon." Jackie apologized.

I felt somewhat down after that, I rested my chin on my hand. "So what have you done lately?" I asked.

"Just work. And ocasionally hanging out with you and the others."

Once we left the pizza parlor, I immediately thought that life needed to get very interesting very fast. We stopped by walmart, so Jackie could help me with some grocery shopping.

"This is the problem Jackie, whole wheat and whole grain are both just as good. I don't know which one to get."

I held up two bags of bread to Jackie who looked at them carefully. After analyzing them she made her choice, "Whole grain."

"Why?"

"It's cheaper."

I couldn't argue with that, so I tossed the whole grain in the cart. We passed by the baby section of walmart.

"Look at this." I said and picked up a huge box of diapers. If it was empty I could fit myself in it. "I'm so glad I'm not like Kendall and need to buy this huge box like every week." I set it down.

"You don't want kids?"

"I'm never having kids." I replied cooly.

"A child is one of the best miracles anyone could have."

"Well children are whiny, pouty, needy, and smelly."

I pushed the cart towards the checkout line.

"I'm just glad I don't have to deal with a kid."

Later on that day Jackie helped me put my groceries away and I dropped her off at her place. She was a really great friend.

I had nothing planned for tonight, so maybe a trip to the strip club wouldn't hurt.

The music was blasting and as far as the eye could see there were strippers in very revealing lingerie. I found a spot near a brunette with a big ass. I love my big booty women. I pulled out some ones and made it rain. Her boobs were like melons! What it must feel like to squeeze them! And to slap that ass! I quickly went over to the person at the counter and ordered a private dance with the brunette. An hour later I found myself sitting on a couch and the brunette grinding on my lap. I slapped her ass multiple times, but she didn't mind. Then her boobs were all up in my face and it felt like heaven! I pinched her nipples, and she did a little strip tease.

James Jr. wanted to see what was going on, so he stuck up. The brunette unzipped my pants and pulled down my boxers just to meet little James. She played with him very nicely is all I can say.

That night I went to sleep very satisfied.

Jackie POV

I don't know what the deal is with James. He's like a reckless teenager trapped inside of a grown mans body. I mean Vegas seriously? No one has time for that. Someone has to teach him how to think and act like a grown up. Even Carlos has left his childish ways.

I don't know what to do with James, he's my best guy friend. This is so difficult!


	3. Chapter 3

I was proud to say that my Tuesday night went swimingly well. It got very heated, very quickly. And when we were done she had a hard time walking. Its a pride thing really.

I was getting myself a drink when there was knock on the door. I set my shot glass down and went to open the door.

"Hello..." I said once I opened the door. It was weird, I didn't see anybody. I shrugged, maybe it was some kids playing ding dong ditch.

"Goodbye..." I said to no one in particular. And just as I was about to coose the door I heard it.

It was a sound that only babies made. I looked down and on the floor, in a basket was a freakin' baby. "Hello? Someone left their baby! Anybody!?" I looked down at the baby, who looked up at me. Well it wasn't my baby, so I quietly closed the door and went back inside. As soon as I did that the baby started crying. The screams were piercing my ears, it was such a high pitched noise. I tried to ignore it but it just kept getting louder. And louder! AND LOUDER! I gave in and opened the door, the baby stopped.

I cursed as I brought the baby inside my apartment. What was I going to do?! The child wasn't mine. I tapped my fingers on the counter, and thought hard. I could see the baby looking at me from the. Orner of my eye.

"What are you looking at?" I said. And then it started to cry again. Like what the fuck?! It was just quiet a couple minutes ago!

"Hey! Shut up!"

And the cries would not stop. I went straight up to the baby, and screamed in its face. "Shut the fuck up!"

I pulled on my hair all this crying was driving me insane. I quickly went over to my whiskey bottle and took a drink. And then there was another knock on the door. I rushed to open it only to find Jackie. I pulled her in my apartment quickly.

"You have to help me!" I said and pointed at the baby.

"Oh my gosh! Where did the baby come from?" she asked.

"I don't know, but help me shut it up."

"Well how do I do that?"

"I don't know, you're a girl, you're supposed to know these types of things."

She went over to the baby and carefully picked it up. As she cradled it I saw a piece of paper fall out of the basket. I picked it up. It was a note, so I read it.

'James, this is Alex Jade Maslow. She is six months old.

P.S. She's your daughter'

I nearly had a heart attack, I dropped the paper and held on the counter. My knees grew weak, my daughter? My child? What the fuck was this?! I never had a child, ever! Is this some type of joke?! If it was it wasn't funny!

"Whoa, James, you okay?" Jackie asked, rocking the baby.

I slid down on the floor. I didn't know what to do. I hoped this was all a dream and that I would wake up soon. But I wasn't waking up.

I took the paper from the floor and handed it to Jackie. I looked at her while she read it, her eyes grew wide once she was finished.

"This baby is your daughter?" She gasped.

"I don't-I don't know how this happened." I said, "She can't be my daughter, I don't even know who the mother is! This is a joke!"

Jackie looked at the baby and back at me, "I don't know...she does kinda look like you."

I got up from the floor, "No don't say that!"

"She's your daughter!"

"No!" I covered my ears with my hands, and started making noises so I couldn't hear her.

Jackie took the baby to the living room and sat down with her on the couch. I ran past her into the hallway and into my room. I had to calm myself down, and clear my thoughts. I closed my eyes and thought hard...like really really hard.

-flashback-

It was Valentines day and James had decided to spend the day with a girl he had been dating. Yeah, dating. James wasn't always looking for a hook up. It was this girlfriend of his that actually made him into what he is now.

James had rented a hotel room along the beach for him and his special lady to spend the weekend at. It was the night before they left, they had decided to get it on. James was excited, he was finally able to get the cookie.

He had just finished some foreplay before he stuck his dick in her. He wore a condom of course, not wanting to ruin his life in one night and get her pregnant. He was pumping into her hard and fast. She was digging her nails into him, and he was proud if she left any scars. At last he came, and he pulled out of her lazily and when he went to take the condom off he realized he could see a little bit of his skin around the head of his dick. He had thought to himself it ripped when he tried to take it off. He wouldn't let any other thought come into mind, for fear that if he did get her pregnant what would he do? Leave most likely.

The rest of the night went very well and it wasn't until a week later when she dumped him for another guy. And it was at that moment when James thought that if she could get another guy then he could get another girl. But he didn't want the heartbreak along with it so he just fucked them. Thats how he came to be what he is now, a manipulator/womanizer/man-whore. All because of that stupid girl that he thought he loved.

-end of flashback-

I thought about it hard, the note said the baby was six months old. We were in April now, so the baby must've been born in October-ish. Go back nine months before...Holy shit! I got up and went out of my room. This can not be happening! I grabbed my phone and went through my contacts, I found her name I had changed it to 'bitch' after she broke up with me. I quickly dialed the number and waited a good while until she answered.

"Hello?"

"Lia what the fuck?!" I screamed.

"I see you got my present, how'd you figure it out you asshole!"

I pulled on my hair, "You can't just leave your baby at my front door! Whats wrong with you!?"

"It's your baby too ya know!"

"No! Don't you get it? I don't the motherfuckin' baby!"

Lia gasped, "Don't talk like that about our child!"

"If you don't want me to talk about her that way then don't come pick her up and take her back?"

I heard her sound frustrated.

"I can't take her back, I'm on a plane to New York."

"Why didn't you take her with you? Or leave her with some relative!?"

"Because I thought it would be a great idea to leave her with the father that left her!"

I looked at the phone, was she serious?

"Uh, well excuse me if I remember correctly, BUT YOU BROKE UP WITH ME! YOU DUMB BITCH!"

"Nuh uh, You started seeing another girl, and you broke up with me!"

I started to take deep breaths this bitch was getting me to my boiling point.

"Well if I knew that you were going drop off your unwanted daughter at my front door, I would've told you the condom ripped!"

I heard her gasp, "You knew the condom ripped and didn't tell me!"

"Yeah! I didn't tell you because I didn't want to believe it!"

"Well good luck with that daughter of yours because I'm never coming back. Ever."

"Good, nobody wants to see your fugly face anyway!" I hung up before I got any more mad. I went to the livingroom and saw Jackie cuddling the baby.

"Why are you doing this?" I said and gestured at the cuddling.

"Aw come on, look at her she's cute."

"She looks disgusting, especially since her mom is a motherfuckin' bitch."

Jackie covered the baby's ears, "don't say that around the baby. And what do you mean her mom? Are you her...dad?"

I nodded and picked up the note, "According to this note and the conversation on the phone I just had, I am supposedly the 'father'. "

Jackie just looked at me, i don't know if she was shocked, surprised or whatever but I could've sworn I saw a little bit of a devious look. Well not exactly devious but a look that says 'this-is-going-to-be-great!'

I sat on the couch across from Jackie.

"How'd you get her to shut up?" I asked.

"I rocked her to calm her down."

"And this is why you should be taking care of that baby and not me." I said.

Jackie shook her head, "No James, if that girl says you're her father and you know you're the father then you have to start taking care of of this child."

I sat up, "Jackie you know me better than anyone else. You know this," I gestured towards myself, "Is not capable of taking care of that." I pointed to the baby.

"You could at least try. Please? I'll help you. Just do it for me? And for the baby?"

I thought about this and gave in just a tiny bit, "Her name is Alex."

Jackie smiled and kissed Alex's cheek.


	4. Chapter 4

**I've been meaning to post this for a while now, so here ya go.**

I called Kendall after Jackie managed to make Alex fall asleep.

"Hello?" I heard Kendalls voice.

"Dude! I need your help." I said.

"Is it another fool proof plan that you think is gonna work but won't in the end?"

"No." I said a bit offended, sometimes my plans worked. We might've gotten in trouble along with the plans before but that wasn't the point.

"Then how can I offer my service?" Kendall asked, I could hear the curiousity in his voice. He probably thought if it wasn't a stupid plan then what could it be?

"You're a dad of three, and I need your fartherly and parental help, now!" I said.

"What do you want me to do?"

"I want you to come over." I said.

"I'm watching the kids since Jo is out, but I must say I'm pretty intrigued at the matter at hand here so I'll be there in ten. Maybe twenty, we have to take potty breaks before we go."

I hung up the phone and walked over to Jackie.

"Well?" She asked.

"He'll be here." I said and look at the sleeping child in Jackie's arms.

"Do you want her?" I asked out of the blue.

"Come on James, don't give her up just like that."

"I can't. This has completely taken me off guard with my life. I can't take care of a baby. Hell I can barely take care of myself."

Jackie smiled, what the hell was she smiling for?

"You do realize you sound responsible right?"

What?

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"You're thinking about the life of this baby, and want it to have a better life by giving her to someone who cares."

I shrugged whatever. And in exactly twenty minutes there was a knock on the door. I answered it quickly, and pulled Kendall in.

"You brought the little ducklings." I said.

"Well I couldn't leave 'em."

"Hi Uncle James." Ben and Emma said.

"Hello, little monsters." The two of them giggled, for some reason it made them laugh when I called them monsters.

"So whats the problem?" Kendall asked, he was carrying Damian in one of those strap thingys that you wear.

"My problem is that." I pointed towards Jackie and baby.

"You have a problem with Jackie?" Kendall looked confused. "No." I said and realized you couldn't see Alex. So I dragged Kendall around the couch and pointed at Alex.

"I need help with that."

Kendall stood there, his face was frozen. It was like he didn't believe what he was seeing.

"Whose baby did you steal?" Was what came out of his mouth when he was finally able to move his lips.

"He didn't steal it, it's his kid." Jackie said.

Kendall looked at me, eyes wide.

"What?!"

"Why would you think I stole a baby?" I asked curious.

"You've done it before."

Oh yeah! I remember that night.

"Well I was drunk then." I added.

"And you got arrested." Jackie pointed out.

Kendall sat down next to Jackie and took Damian out of his pouch thing. He set Damian beside him, "Can I hold her?" He asked.

Jackie nodded and carefully placed Alex in Kendall's arms. I will admit though the tiniest part of me was jealous. I was jealous that Kendall got to hold my kid before me. I mean it was my baby you would think that the dad would get to hold her first. I just watched Kendall look at Alex so lovingly, so fatherly. And I thought to myself that I don't have those types of features. I would never give enough love to this baby as much as Kendall does to his. It just can't happen. This is all too sudden for me, I started feeling lightheaded and everything started spinning. I got up and headed towards my room.

"Where are you going?" Kendall asked. I waved my hand at him and told him not to worry about it. My walk to my room was difficult, I felt like everything was lopsided. I ended up running into the doorframe, and I assumed I knocked myself out because I remember after that was black darkness.

I woke up in my bed, and my head hurt. I touched my head and felt a bump. I sighed, it'll go away eventually. How did I end up in my bed? And why does my apartment smell good? I got up quickly and rushed out of my room.

"Jackie? Kendall?" I called walking into the livingroom.

No answer. Hmm..weird. I don't hear Alex either. Maybe it was all just a bad dream. There was never a baby at my front door, and Jackie hasn't come over and I never called Kendall. I small smile appeared on my face. Yeah, thats it James, it was just a bad dream. Wooo! What a bad dream that was. I would never be a father to any child. I turned and walked into the kitchen and stopped dead in my tracks.

It wasn't a bad dream, it was a nightmare and it was true! Jackie was at the stove stirring something, while Alex was sleeping in the basket she came in. What the fuck?! I hung my head low and picked up the whiskey bottle that was on the floor. I took a sip, actually several sips. Jackie turned around when I burped.

"Excuse me."

"Glad to see that you're feeling okay." She smiled.

"What're you doing at the stove?"

"I felt like you needed a home made meal after all that happened. Spaghetti sound good?"

I took a seat on a bar stool at the island in the middle of the kitchen.

"Sounds great...Where's K-dog?" I asked not seeing Kendall liked I remembered.

"He went to the store to get you a few things for Alex."

"That little thing is still here, great." I put my head down.

There was a knock on the door again. Ugh. I got up and went to answer it. It was Kendall with his three little monsters and Jo.

Kendall had a couple of bags in his hands and a box.

"Hey, again." I said and let them in.

"I didn't believe it when Kendall told me so I came to see for myself." Jo said.

"Of course." I whispered.

"Now where is the little munchkin?"

"In the kitchen." I said, "Whats in the bags?" I asked Kendall.

"Things that you need." He said simply and carried them over to the kitchen table. What? What else did I need?

He set the items down and showed me what he bought me. The first thing he pulled out was a blue can. "Similac." He said, "Or baby formula. You have to put a scoop of this powered stuff into a baby bottle full of water. You shake it and then give it to Alex."

I took the can from him, so this is what babies drink huh? Next he took out little containers with different colors in them. It looked like pudding.

"These, are your baby foods. They range in all different kinds of fruit and vegetable flavors. Damian's favorite is banana, but we'll see which one Alex likes best." I looked at the little glass jars with blended carrots. It looked gross, but I wasn't gonna eat it.

Kendall took out a blue-ish green-ish bag, a white bag, and a blue tube.

"Diapers, wipes, and diaper rash ointment or cream whatever you wanna call it. Pretty self explanitory."

I put my hand up, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold up. You mean I actually have to change a smelly diaper? A diaper with poop and pee? Or diarrhea?"

All three adults nodded. Fuck! I didn't ask for any of this! This was stupid. Damn! Shit! Fuck!

"I appreciate what you guys are doing for me, but I never asked for any of this! Not the baby or the stuff!"

"Aw come on James, she's cute." Jo said cuddling Alex. I almost gagged.

"No, she's a noisy little thing, that just barged into my life and ruined it." I sat down, chugged the rest of my whiskey.

There was some tension in the kitchen. No one said anything after I spoke.

"Spaghetti's ready." Jackie said. Breaking the silence.

"I don't think I'm hungry anymore." I said and went to lay down on the couch. Kendall followed me.

"Don't give up James. Try giving this a chance."

"You want me to give this baby that I never even wanted a chance?"

Kendall nodded, "It's not that bad. Remember the first time you held Ben at the hospital? You smiled down at him and said Hey Ben I'm your uncle James and there was this look in your eye and it was a loving look as you smiled down at him. You'll like having Alex around eventually."

I thought about what Kendall just said. Of course I remember when Ben was born, it was the day before our last concert being the band Big Time Rush. We all rushed to the hospital and waited for the little guy to come out. It was something special back then. When I saw myself as being a father one day with whatever special lady was chosen to be my wife. The feeling I had when Ben was born was a special one that I'll never forget. But this was nothing like that. This was on a totally different scale. I wasn't prepared for this. I took a deep breath, "I want a paternity test."

"I thought you were the father."

"I know...I just- I just want to make sure."

"Alright, sure. I'll schedule one for you."

"Thanks K-dog."

From the kitchen I could hear Jo coo over Alex.

"James she's adorable!"

And me being the person that I was said, "You want her?" Kendall gave me a look.

"Kidding..." Although part of me wasn't. Ben came into the livingroom and jumped on Kendall's back.

"Hey Uncle James!"

"Hey Benjamin."

"It's Ben..." He said.

"Ben is short for Benjamin."

He gave me a confused look, "So whats James short for?"

"James is short for James." I said, and smiled because I knew he would be utterly confused.

Jackie had put Alex on my bed in the corner where the bed met the wall. She was sleeping again. I looked at her. She was small, and I guess she was cute. I don't know... She was something, something different. I changed out of the days clothes and into my pajamas, which only consisted of my boxer briefs.

I looked at Alex once more and left my room. I heard the unmistakeable jingle of keys and i started to wonder. I went into the livingroom and saw Jackie putting her coat on, and grabbing her purse.

"Whoa, where do you think you're going?" I asked her. She stopped mid-coat and said, "Home. I have work tomorrow."

"I thought you were gonna stay and help me take care of Alex?"

"I am," she said putting the rest of her coat on, "When I get off at five."

It was hard for Jackie not to look at James in nothing but boxer briefs. Every muscle in his body was toned and defined, his abs were the best each little pack was visible. All six of them. And she couldn't resist not looking down at his privates. Through the boxers she could tell James was big. She had to stop looking at him before he caught on.

"What if Alex wakes up in the middle of the night? What do I do then?" I asked. She bit her lip. It was kinda cute the way she did that, but who am I to say that? She's just a friend.

"Just check if she needs a diaper change or if shes hungry. And then put her back to sleep."

She stepped towards the door. I didn't want her to leave but I guess she had to. I gave her a hug before she left and told her thank you for everything that she's done. She replied with a you're welcome. And after that she was gone, and I instantly missed my friend, mostly because...I was scared.

Leaving me alone with a baby has got to be one of the worst ideas ever but here I was with a baby sleeping next to me. I could hear Alex's little breaths, and see the rise and fall of her tiny chest. I hoped I wouldn't roll over and squish her to death in the middle of the night. I tend to get closer to the wall on hot nights.

There are many ways one could wake up and a baby screaming in your face was one. It scared me so much that I screamed and fell off my bed. My back broke my fall on the hard wood floor.

"Aw fuck!" I said, and slowly got up. Alex making my ears bleed. I looked at the clock, three o' two.

"What the fuck Alex?! Its three fucking o' two!" But she just kept crying. I got my pillow and covered my ears with it, but the desperate cries got through. I threw the pillow down in frustration, what did Jackie say? Diaper change. Hungry...I thought about it I was kinda hungry. I turned on the light and scooted Alex towards me and I felt her diaper. It felt like someone had put pudding in there. Oh shit! I slowly unbottoned her onsie, and opened her diaper. The stench that came out reeked like hell.

"Oh my...shit! That stinks!"

Alex's crying toned down a bit but she was still crying.

I opened the rest of the diaper and all hell broke loose.

I nearly fainted. It smelled like shit, looked like shit, and it was SHIT! I tried to remember Kendall's instructions on how to change a diaper. Earlier Alex had peed and Kendall changed her diaper and I just watched unamused. But that was pee, it was easier than freakin poop! I couldn't get the smell out of my nose and quickly grabbed the wipes. I took like five at once and wiped Alex.

By far the most disgusting thing I've ever done. And I've done some pretty dirty things, kinky too. I grabbed another ten wipes and made sure Alex was poop free. I put a Minnie Mouse diaper on her and closed up her onsie. When I was done she wasn't crying any more. Thank God. I threa the freakin poop grenade away and just when I thought every thing was fine...Alex started screaming again.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" I turned to Alex, "What the fuck do you want now?!"

All I got was cries in response.

What was the other thing...oh yeah maybe she was hungry. I know I'm hungry. I put Alex over my shoulder and went into the kitchen.

I set her down on the island and she almost fell. I stopped her though. I put her on the floor and she disappeared immediately. I caught her crawling to the livingroom. I brought her back, and looked around at where I could put her. The sink! Of course! She wouldn't be able to get out of there. I placed her in the sink, and she started to wail.

"Shut up, I'm getting your mothafuckin' bottle!"

This was irritating; I fixed her bottle and handed it to her, and she took it happily.

"Yeah you better drink that."

I grabbed a box of oreo cookies from the cabinet and ate across from Alex.

I realized my life changed in less than 24 hours. Earlier this morning I was going to drink and possibly call my thursday night lady. But then my plans got ruined and Alex showed up. Little cock blocker. Alex looked at me when she drank, "What the fuck are you looking at? Cock blocker."

I guess what she thought I said was funny because she gave me a smile and little chuckle.

"I'm insulting you, and you think this is funny!?"

That earned another giggle. Babies...these days...

One thing I noticed though...was that she drank the same way I did. One hand, pinkie up. She could be mine...

**I know I kinda switched between 3rd and 1st person point of view so sorry if you got confused. Review :)**


	5. Chapter 5

By now I'm pretty sure Kendall and Jackie have told everyone else about my unexpected baby. They tend to tell everyone, everything. I don't mind though, maybe I'll get more help.

But I'm exhausted, Alex woke me up like three times during the night. Once for her poop fiasco and a she wanted a bottle, again not even an hour after that because she pissed all in her diaper, and the third time because I think she was cold. I don't know how Kendall does this with Damian. Right now Alex was sleeping, thank you baby Jesus.

I took advantage of this time to shower and get dressed. And sure enough when I got out the shower Alex was crying. Again. I was drying my hair with my towel as I walked to Alex.

She looked up at me, expecting me to do something I guess. But her cries got louder so I took that as she wanted another bottle. I was still tired when I walked into the kitchen, and I buy bottled water or water by the gallon because I don't have a filter that connects to the faucet. I grabbed two water bottles from the fridge, one had 1/4 of water, the other one was full. I opened the 1/4 filled one and poured it in the bottle. I opened the other and poured the rest in the bottle, grabbed a scoop of formula and shook everything together.

I felt like my ears were bleeding, they started to hurt with all this crying.

"Here's your fucking bottle." I said and handed Alex the bottle. She gladly accepted it and started drinking. I had to go to work today and I know I couldn't leave Alex here alone, so...I called up Jackie.

"Hello?" She voice said. I smiled for some reason I always liked her voice, it was warm and welcoming.

"Hey Jacks, can you watch Alex while I go to work?"

"James, I'm at work right now."

"But you said you'd help me."

"At five when I got off of work."

"Then what am I supposed to do? I need to be away from the little booger."

I heard Jackie sigh from the other line. Was she giving in? I am a very good persuader.

"Fine...just bring her to my office."

"Thank you!" I sang. Kendall came earlier and once again brought me a whole shit load of crap that I need for Alex. One of the things included a car seat that Emma grew out of which I brought down to my car and went back to get Alex. She was awake so I had to carry her to the car, and I had to say she was being very quiet.

I buckled her in and got in the drivers seat. I looked at her throught the rear view mirror, she was just staring out the window. How can she be mine I thought to myself. The drive to Jackie's office was nice and quiet, I had the radio on just a bit and Alex didn't make a single peep. Maybe she finally understands that crying won't get you no where.

I pulled up into the parking lot, and took Alex out of the car seat and carried her inside. I saw the same receptionist from last time.

I never called her, though I should've. Blonde, blue eyes, and big boobs, what else could a guy ask for? I haven't seen her ass yet, but I bet its huge! She smiled at me but her smile faded when she saw me carrying Alex.

"Hey.." I said.

"You have a baby?" she asked.

"Oh this?" I pointed at Alex, "Oh no, this is my friends baby, I babysit...every now..and then." I lied.

"Oh how nice. Whats her name?"

"Alex." I looked at Alex, "We're gonna see mommy Alex!"

Alex didn't respond much, she was quiet. Which was starting to worry me just a bit. Like 5% of me was concerned.

"Well when you drop her off, we should hang out sometime." The blonde, Kaylie said.

"How about tonight?" I asked.

"Perfect."

"My place seven o' clock. I'll pick you up later." I winked at her and walked away. And thats how the James Maslow gets the girls. Cool, calm and collected. The three C's. I stepped in the elevator with Alex and pressed the number four. She really seemed out of it. I shrugged, maybe its just a stage.

I knocked on Jackie's office door, and I heard a faint come in. I opened the door and smiled at my friend.

"Hey..." I said.

"Hey." She said.

"I brought Alex."

"I see."

I set Alex down on the chair across from Jackie.

"Whats wrong with her?" She asked.

"What do you mean?"

"She seems like she's in a daze." Jackie said.

I shrugged, "I don't know she was like that after a gave her, her bottle."

"And how long ago was that?" Jackie asked getting out of her chair and walking over to Alex. She picked her up and cradled her.

"I don't know maybe one...two hours ago?"

"How much did you give her?"

"The regular amount, a bottle full of water and a scoop of formula..."

My words trailed off. A bottle full of water...i grabbed two water bottles from the fridge. If I remember correctly one was 3/4 empty and the other was full. The full bottle was a new one, the 3/4 empty one was open already.

It just instantly clicked. I used the 3/4 empty bottle before to sneak in alcohol at work. I had bought tasteless, colorless, odorless, alcohol. Alcohol!

"SHIT!" I said loudly.

"What?" Jackie asked.

"I gave alcohol to Alex!"

"You gave alcohol to a baby?!"

"Isn't that what I just said?"

Jackie put Alex down, "How could you let that happen?"

"It was the alcohol that looked like water, I didn't know!"

"This is bad!"

"I know!"

We both looked at Alex. What were we supposed to do?

"We have to take her to the hospital." Jackie said.

"No! If we take her to the hospital I could get in trouble! I gave alcohol to a fuckin' baby! Charges could be pressed against me. I don't need none of that."

"Well then what do we do?"

"We just wait until the alcohol goes through her system."

I walked towards the door, "So watch her for me. And I'll be back, in an hour or two. Maybe three. Possibly four. Bye!" I was quick to leave before Jackie called after me. Well that was a huge mistake. I should label the bottles of water. I went down to the lobby and stopped by the front desk.

"See you at seven, babe." I said and winked. Kaylie nearly fainted. Woo, the effect I have on women.

I skipped out of the building and hopped in my car. I haven't been laid in like two days, my privates are itching for some action, but I'll get that taken care of later.

Jackie POV

I can't believe James gave alcohol to Alex! This was unbelievable! But I guess I should just do as James said and wait for the alcohol to get through her system no need to get arrested. But I feel like I should do something. Ugh! Just when I thought he was getting more responsible. He does this! This is ridiculous!

About an hour or two later Alex started crying and she seemed to be more normal. I changed her diaper and let her crawl around my office.

James POV

I went to work and did some reading. I took over my moms cosmetics business, like she wanted me to because after Big Time Rush I didn't have anything planned. She still stops by to make sure I'm running the company smoothly which I always do. I have to say I'm really good at business. Who would've thought? I gave myself the rest of the day off and went home. I cleaned up the apartment, and hid all baby related items into the guest room. I also made a very nice romantic dinner of chicken with veggies and mashed potatoes on the side. I lit some candles on the table, got out a new bottle of wine and played some soft romantic music. It was almost seven and I went to go pick up Kaylie.

Jackie's POV

It was almost seven and James still hasn't come by to pick up Alex. I think he might've forgotten about her. I worked over time today since I could really use the money. And Alex wasn't much of a hassle, I don't know why James complains so much. Alex is really cute and sweet. I packed up my stuff and decided to bring Alex home to James and maybe help him out with stuff.

James POV

As soon as I opened the door to my apartment Kaylie jumped on me and started kissing me.

"You're so HOT!" She said. I kicked the door closed, and led her to the couch. She laid down and I got on top of her, and we kissed for a couple more minutes before I stopped.

"I made dinner." I said, I was kinda hungry and was hoping she'd want to eat. I don't like to brag but I make a mean roast chicken.

She ran her fingers through my hair, "The only thing I want in my mouth is your dick." She said and touched my private area with her hand. I quietly squeaked, it felt good.

"You know we could skip dinner." I said.

"Sounds good." she answered and pulled me in for more kissing. I pulled away from her lips and started to kiss down her neck, and then to her chest. She unbottoned my shirt and ran her hands all over my chest and abs.

"I like what I see." She purred.

"I like what I'm about to see." I said and took off her shirt and bra. And I was right, her boobs were huge! I dug my face right into them.

Needless to say we ended up naked and I was pumping into her when...

Jackie's POV

I was outside of James' apartment door. I had called him but he didn't answer. Maybe he was in the shower or something. It didn't matter, I knew he kept a spare key on top of the door frame. I reached up and got it and unlocked the door...

I walked inside and saw James' backside but I could tell he was naked.

"James?" I said and he looked back at me.

"Jackie! What are you doing here?!"

"I came by to drop off Alex because you never came by to pick her up..."I looked around the apartment, the kitchen was set up for a romantic dinner, and the lights were dimmed.

"What exactly are you doing?" I asked him, suspicious.

"Um, nothing..." He said.

"Well your daughter needs her father so, here you go."

And then I heard someone else move and it was the blonde from the lobby. She stood up and her boobs were showing and she was obviously naked, and the situation was getting pretty weird/awkward for me.

"Wait so, thats your baby?!" She said.

"Um..." James started to say and rubbed the back of his neck.

"You told me it was hers!" She said gesturing towards me.

"Its definitely not mine." I said. "Its all James'"

"You lied to me!" Kaylie shouted and grabbed her clothes.

"Kaylie wait! Its not what it looks like!" And Kaylie stormed out of the apartment.

James pulled his hair in frustration. "Thanks a lot Jackie."

"I'm gonna let you put some clothes on before we finish this talk."

"Its not like you haven't seen me naked before."

"Actually I haven't." I said turning away.

"Really? I could've sworn you have."

"Just put some clothes on." I said, good thing Alex was sleeping, she didn't need to see any of that.

I waited for five minutes then James came in the livingroom and sat down on the couch.

"I'm so sorry you had to see that." He said.

"I think I'm blind."

"Hey," He said defensively, "I have a nice body."

"Doesn't matter, the point is you left me with Alex for six hours and you said you'd come back but you never did!"

"Jackie, I know it sounds bad, but..."

"But what?" I threw my hands in the air.

"But you got to spend a lot of time with Alex." He tried to crack a smile. I kept a straight face though.

"You can't keep doing this, you have to be there for her!"

"I never wanted any of this Jackie! I didn't want the baby or the responsibility! Can't you guys see that I'm perfectly fine being single and with no child?!"

"Well its time to grow the f*ck up James! Cause you won't be young and pretty forever!"

He gasped, "Don't say that!"

"Well you better believe it!"

And then we heard Alex start to cry. Great. Her cries were loud, I will admit that.

"Shut the fuck up!" James yelled in her face. I couldn't believe he just did that!

"Don't yell at her!"

"She won't shut up!"

I picked Alex up and started rocking her. "Is that what you do? When she doesn't stop crying, you yell at her?"

James crossed his arms, "Maybe."

"I cannot believe you!" I grabbed Alex's diaper bag. "I'm taking Alex for the night."

"Good. Take her. I didn't want her here anyways."

"You are unbelievable." I stood up and walked out the door with Alex.

James POV

What the hell just happened? I just fought with my best friend over a baby! Oh my gosh! I am glad she took Alex though maybe now I'll get some sleep. I can't believe she came in here and interrupted me having sex. I wasn't mad at all, its happened before. I was mad at the fact that she told Kaylie the baby was mine, and now I may need see her again.

I got a beer from the fridge and sat down on the couch, maybe some tv will take my mind off of things.

It was great, I was watching a movie and it was getting really good that is, until there was a knock on the door.

"Fuck." I whispered.

I got up to answer it but I should've looked through the peep hole first cause as soon as I opened the door i got a punch to the face. I stumbled back holding my jaw.

"Aw! Fuck! What the hell was that for?!"

"For upsetting Jackie!"

"What?" I looked up and saw Jackie's ex, Mitch. I never liked Mitch and I was glad when he and Jackie broke up.

"What the hell Mitch? You just can't come to my apartment and punch me in the jaw."

"Yes I can."

I hated this guy with a passion, he was so...ugh...

I got close to him and punched him in the nose. It wasn't until a few seconds later that we saw the blood. Then he kicked me in the stomach and then it turned out into a full on fight. He pushed me up against the wall and held me by my collar.

"Don't ever make Jackie upset? You got that? Punk!"

"Why do you care?"

"I still love her!"

"Sure, thats why you guys broke up."

He punched my face once again and slammed me against the wall, again.

"Just stay away from her!" He said and left. I just sat there. What the fuck just happened? Mitch just beat me up because I made Jackie upset. Did Jackie call Mitch? I'm gonna be so upset if she did. I got up and went inside, my body ached. This was not my day.


End file.
